I was cleaning up the kitchen bench yesterday when I stumbled upon a lolly bag. My son attended a child birthday party a little over a week ago and the lolly bag had been sitting on the bench, long forgotten. Alex was happily eating his lunch so I offered him the deal if he finished his lunch he could have a few lollies as a treat. He eventually got there so I gave him half a dozen jelly baby type lollies. Later on that evening, as Alex was struggling through his dinner as usual, his father offered him the same deal. "Finish your dinner and you can have a few lollies" Alex eventually got through the meal and he was given five lollies. Later on that night I was thinking, 'Geez Alex has had a lot of lollies today!' and cast my mind back to a previous birthday party.
It was your fairly standard birthday party, children running around, boys 'shooting' one another of course Alex did not participate in this, he doesn't understand the social norms so he lay on the floor driving a car back and forth in front of his eyes. There was fairly standard party food, cupcakes, lollies, chips and all sorts of things that would make any childs eyes light up. Alex wasn't any different to any other child when it came to treat food he had about half a cupcake and was green ear to ear from the icing. He requested chips, we gave him two or three, he asked for lollies, again we gave him a small amount. The other children whilst running around were downing handfuls of lollies, handfuls of chips a cupcake was downed in a matter of seconds and they eyed off having another. The end of the party was my real eye opener. A 'loot bag' was handed out to each child, Alex recognised it straight away and asked for a lolly. I told him no, he'd had enough sweets and treats that day and he can have some tomorrow he accepted the answer and went back to playing. "Geez he's good!" I hear near me I look around and see one of the mothers nearby is talking to me. I look around and every other child is digging hand over fist into their lolly bag, most were empty before they left the party. Should it be expected for a child to tantrum if they are told they're not having any more junk? Or was it the fact that earlier on that day I had broken the news to this parent of my childs recent diagnosis of Autism, and she expected a tantrum like in the movies? But am I an over paranoid parent who doesn't 'let up' and let him go hog wild crazy at parties? Or in a house of over-hyped, over-tired and over-sugared children, am I the sense of reason?
I would just like to clarify that I am not passing any judgment on any parent who decides to let their child have lots of lollies, chips or whatever. Every parent has the right to make the choice in what is right for them and their child.
ReplyDeleteto be honest i have seen many children both with and without learning disabilities that will chuck a tantrum if they don't get what they feel is theirs, alex is genuinely a good kid.
ReplyDeleteEvery parent has the right to make the choice in what is right for them and their child.
ReplyDeleteHells NO! So many parents haven't got a clue, it's downright irresponsible giving them that sort of right. You probably didn't mean it in such wide-ranging terms, but this is exactly the sort of sentiment that teachers and health professionals everywhere have to fight against every working day.
OWG: I reckon you're right.